August 16, 2011
Nick's Friggin' Tumblr Page: Weekly Meeting of the Twitter Elite™

nickadoola:

(I’m so, so, so going to hell for this one, aren’t I?)

The Twitter Elite™ are very real. They get together to conspire against everyone once a week. I’ve obtained a transcript of their last meeting. As you’ll see, however, they don’t get much accomplished.

@badbanana This meeting of the Twitter…

4:18pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy8P3F40
(Notes: 363)
  
July 17, 2011

As a teacher with a terminal disease who’s desperate to provide financially for my family before I die…I wish there was a show on TV  I could relate to.

7:45pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy7DVBzc
(Notes: 10)
  
March 15, 2011
eject: An Open Letter To Another Canadian Mother

kellyoxford:

Dear Canadian Mother,

Yesterday I tweeted something like, “I wonder how many waiters serve a pregnant Victoria Beckham and think to themselves ‘Eating for one are we?’”

But I erased it because it was brought to my attention that Joan Rivers already said “Congratulations to Victoria Beckham,…

1:02pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy3dH85o
(Notes: 411)
  
February 12, 2011
Other Possible Jobs for Hosni Mubarak:

Here’s Letterman’s Top Ten Hosni Mubarak Future Plans list:

10.Chill 9.Gonna look for a place in the Poconos 8.Check classifieds for job openings under “Ruthless Dictator” 7.Wander around the Sahara desert with his metal detector 6.Heard “The Office” needs a new boss to replace Steve Carell 5.Golf with Osama 4.Do some freestyle pickin’ 3.Watch Snooki on Dave. It’s gonna be sick! 2.Hoping his intolerance and thuggish behavior will land him a job at Fox News 1.Launching pop career under the name “Hustin Mubieber”

Here are some I would add: 

  1. Run for 2012 G.O.P. Presidential candidate (Of course, he would have to run as moderate).
  2. Bank of America Home Mortgages Department
  3. Human Resources for Disney World
  4. Mayor of Chicago
  5. Stand at Traffic light with a “Will Work As Dictator For Food”

Any other suggestions?

4:31pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy32HCVD
January 15, 2011

Just rented The Social Network to watch with my wife.  Afterward, I’m hoping to poke her.

7:07pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy2b1Pf6
(Notes: 3)
  
January 11, 2011
eject: HOW TO GET A GUN IN CANADA, AND OTHER RATIONAL THINGS

kellyoxford:

The majority of pro-gun Americans seem to always be chanting ‘It’s my RIGHT!’
These people are dumb shits.



In Canada you have the right to own a gun and ammo…
You have the right to bear the arms, and shoot shit up and have guns up the yin yang.

But here is how you do it, you can’t just…

1:16pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy2W_kk7
(Notes: 354)
  
January 4, 2011

gilesmarie asked: Hey.

Happy New Year! What's the forecast for 2011?

Thanks - Happy New Year to you too! I hadn’t thought of a 2011 forecast - I’m just living in the moment.  Having a terminal disease that currently has no cure, I struggle not to obsess about the future.  Though all too often, I do obsess, especially when I see something that will be in the near future, like my credit card expiration date (2013), I wonder if I’ll be alive.

Jeez - just call me Derby Downer!  Sorry about that.  I’m feeling optimistic though.  There is much promising research that may lead to the breakthrough.   

5:22pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy2R2P0O
(Notes: 1)
  
January 4, 2011
Rob Delaney: I'm going to read some of these tweets on TV today

robdelaney:

  • I think it’s ok to make the jerkoff motion whenever a college student talks about their thoughts/feelings/beliefs.
  • When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s LUNAR ASSAULT and it’s not funny.
  • Been a while since “It’s the End of the World as We Know It” & “We Didn’t Start…

1:33pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy2QtiPr
(Notes: 42)
  
December 31, 2010
Sometimes I Don't Mind: 10 Top Tweets: @CabbageNews

flyoverjoel:

This one really sticks in my craw. You see @Cabbagenews is someone’s secondary account and is AWESOME! But because @Cabbagenews doesn’t actively talk to people, go out and follow folks or proactively (fuck, I hate that word) star people he (based on the male avatar) has only 635 followers. I wish…

2:22pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy2Nk5J6
(Notes: 21)
  
October 26, 2010

I  know that People Magazine/ Tea Party tweet was silly.  I read recently that indignation is the most self-deluding emotion.  Maybe I’m deluding myself that the right wing nuts are that idiotically transparent (Unfortanately, we all know they aren’t that transparent to the voting idiocracy).  I am indignant at the prospect of losing the optimism & hope many of us with terminal or debillitating neuromuscular diseases have in promising stem cell research to right wing politicians that claim to be against “big governmment,” yet have no problem with bending us over, grabbing us by the hips & buttfucking our hope with their self-righteous, hypocritical “moral” legislation.   I’m frustrated at living in a country where science is increasingly demonized & set back by morons who make me wish “political asylum” was an institution to treat right wing nuts for being mentally unemployed.  My wife & I have wanted to expatriate to some European country for several years simply to experience living in a different country.  Now we dream of moving to a country where the political line dividing the left from the right is in it’s proper place, instead of just being a line that divides the right wing. We barely have a political left in this country.   Maybe China taking our place as the top superpwer will be good for the U.S. & the world.   Can I get a high five on that, Hu Jintao? 

4:08pm  |   URL: http://tumblr.com/ZWVtSy1J-Fe-
(Notes: 1)
  
Liked posts on Tumblr: More liked posts »